'Cause he gets up in the morning
And he goes to work at nine
And he comes back home at five-thirty
Gets the same train every time
'Cause his world is built round punctuality
It never fails

And hes oh, so good
And hes oh, so fine
And hes oh, so healthy
In his body and his mind

He's a well respected man about town
Doing the best things so conservatively

And his mother goes to meetings
While his father pulls the maid
And she stirs the tea with councilllors
While discussing foreign trade
And she passes looks, as well as bills
At every suave young man

'Cause hes oh, so good
And hes oh, so fine
And hes oh, so healthy
In his body and his mind

He's a well respected man about town
Doing the best things so conservatively

And he likes his own backyard
And he likes his fags the best
'Cause hes better than the rest
And his own sweat smells the best
And he hopes to grab his fathers loot
When pater passes on

'Cause hes oh, so good
And hes oh, so fine
And hes oh, so healthy
In his body and his mind

He's a well respected man about town
Doing the best things so conservatively

And he plays at stocks and shares
And he goes to the regatta
And he adores the girl next door
'Cause hes dying to get at her
But his mother knows the best about
The matrimonial stakes

'Cause hes oh, so good
And hes oh, so fine
And hes oh, so healthy
In his body and his mind

Hes a well respected man about town
Doing the best things so conservatively.

